Writer's Notebook

"Simon, why are you marrying me?"

I'll admit the question took me by surprise.

"Because I love you," I stammered. "I love you and I want to be with you and I want everyone to know it."

She cuddled up to me on the couch and showed me a book she'd been reading.

"I got this book from Thérèse. It's all about what marriage really is. It's quite interesting."

"Well, I know what marriage is. It's about two people coming together and committing themselves to each other. It's a sort of contract if you like."

"Well, that's precisely what it isn't. At least, that's what this guy says. He says too many people consider marriage as a sort of contract. Contracts are usually drawn up for a limited period of time and lay down various conditions which are either implicit or stated explicitly. But he says a marriage is something far more than that.I'll be honest, love. It's something I've never really thought about very much. Like you, I more or less took it for granted, but maybe it's worth thinking about a bit more."

"Are you trying to tell me, you don't know if you want to marry me?" I said with a shiver. "It's a bit late for that now, isn't it. It's all supposed to be happening next week."

"No, that's not at all what I want to say. I just want to enter into our marriage with my eyes wide open. I love you and I want that love to be something strong, something beautiful; something to lean on even in difficult times."

I still wasn't quite sure what she was getting at, but I realised I couln't afford another mistake like my last answer. I just looked at her absent-mindedly, a look she interpreted perfectly.

"You poor dear, you haven't a clue what I'm talking about, have you. Thérèse said you wouldn't. She was right. And look at you, now you're blushing." But it was said with a great deal of tenderness and we ended rolling around a bit on the sofa.

But our conversation had given me food for thought. I wanted to know more, so the next day I proposed we start reading the book together. And what we learnt most definitely changed my view of what marriage was all about.